The Parmesan Problem
My cheese costs too much!!!
I love to buy parmesan. Specifically, Parmigiano Reggiano. The stuff that has to be from a specific region of Italy or whatever. It’s more expensive than buying regular lowercase parmesan or other variations thereof and therefore I’ve convinced myself that it’s a special treat reserved for special occasions.
Consequently, I never use all of the parmesan a recipe requires because it’s expensive. And, if I use less of it, it’ll last longer, right? Unfortunately not.
The problem is that I never actually use up all the parmesan I buy. I don’t know if I’ve ever used up a whole triangle of cheese before it gets moldy or begins ingesting the smell of my refrigerator.
This idea, that it’s better to just use all the things we deem too special to use, is a pretty well-known phenomenon, I must admit. I remember when I was a kid, my mom told me a story about a woman who had a really nice nightgown that she never wore because it was so nice and then one day, she died without having worn it. Cause of death unknown because the woman definitely only exists for the sake of this parable.
(My mom also told me a story about someone who died because there was a pencil in their sheets that stabbed them in the heart while they were jumping on the bed, so expect a forthcoming essay on my fear of pencils.)
Moral of the nightgown story: you can die anytime, so just use the nice things.
A major part of our hesitation to use things is that we often see items as being temporary, fleeting parts of our lives. Our relationship with things is such that if it’s broken or old it can be discarded, not mended or preserved. If we accept that our items can be friends with us forever, there’s nothing to fear from a little wear.
It’s nice to save things for a future self. But you, too, could die at any time from natural causes, such as being the main character in a cautionary tale for children.
It’s easy to feel like using too much of something or having too much of something can devalue it. I mean, this is definitely true in some cases, like having too many clothes or so much stuff you can’t use it all.
But in other cases, such as spending $3-4 more on cheese, I think we can safely say that using an appropriately generous amount of cheese will not devalue enjoyment of it.
I’ve always had a fear of excess. I’ve always been the person to risk being underdressed rather than overdressed. It all connects to many things — my fear of overconsumption, my fear of being seen as overindulging in anything.
I don’t know exactly why I feel this way but let’s just chalk it up to America’s puritanical founding and Catholic asceticism. There’s a fundamental idea of the worthiness of suffering in these doctrines, and I guess that has to apply to my tomato pasta dinners as well?? But I’m declaring the virtue of restriction over, for myself and you too if you feel like it.
No more suffering for suffering’s sake. No more eating the bare minimum of cheese because it’s more virtuous or something. I’m going to start living like an Oil Tycoon, just for the heck of it. (Oil Tycoon summer instead of Barbie summer, anyone?)
A few other items to which the Parmesan Problem applies for me:
Film photography
Posting writing
Turning up my heat in the winter
Nostalgia (Afraid to listen to the same nostalgic song too many times else it loses its devastating emotional impact)
Several “delicate” vintage items of clothing
Anyway, in conclusion: I will be buying an entire wheel of Parmesan cheese and eating it in one sitting.